Friday, April 30, 2010


Rhett was blessed on a beautiful spring day
Sunday March 28th, 2010
After only being in this world a short week

We chose this date because my parents were only going to be with us a short week and a couple days...and we wanted to have as many family members help bless him.
Grandma and Grandpa Hutchings
They say it takes a village to raise a child
I say it takes a village to raise a newborn, especially considering my circumstances this go around.

Uncle John and Aunt Cara Higley
Cara IS Rhett's AUNT MOMMY and has SAVED our family
she loves Rhett as if he were her own
Grandma and Grandpa Sorensen
OF course Grandma and Grandpa Sorensen were able to make it up as well
Uncle Scott Sorensen
AND they brought Uncle Scott up with is always a special "treat" when we get him
Dacie enjoyed having a napping partner for sure

Grandpa Bert DOUGLAS Sorensen-is whose name we gave Rhett as his middle name.
We hope he will be as successful, outdoorsy, talented, stable, generous and laid back as his Grandpa.

The GREEN/BLUE BLANKET was the original blanket that Dan was blessed in as a baby.
The WHITE BLANKET was one I got while I was serving as a missionary, from one of my favorite members in Paradise, California. She had gotten it in Jerusalem and it is a blessing blanket. I saved it until I had children of my own to bless in it.

Despite my own personal darkness that had enveloped me at this point. I was grateful that I did have time to smell, kiss and enjoy my baby a little on this special of special days.


Rhett we LOVE you and are grateful you braved it all and joined our family!!!

Saturday, April 24, 2010



entered the world on

March 19,2010

at 3:10pm

weighing: 7lbs. 15 oz.

20 inches long(this is me after spending a "lovely" night in the hospital-being pumped FULL of fluids, epidural in, right before delivery)
So..I know you are dying to hear the story!

Here it goes:

As many of you know. I typically go over-due. My babies LOVE to stay inside and my body prefers to keep them there(especially my boys)! Rhett's plans were no different.

I had made NO progress at my weekly appointments (OK maybe I was at a 2 with no effacement). I had absolutely settled in on the idea of having him late. I had a great pregnancy overall and was sleeping. The pepcid worked great on my heartburn and I LOVED eating! So I was not complaining and knew the longer Rhett "cooked" the more ready he would be to come. HOWEVER-in the process, only him and I were getting allot bigger- so I had scheduled an induction for a week after he was due. I was doing this to ensure I had as much time with Dan by my side as well, and with help on its way...I did not want to waste a day of that.
(We all had a good little laugh at his super sad pouty face)
So my spring break plans ensued and I got a NEW list of things to get ready before he arrived all made out, and started them. I was content.
As many of you are aware when you go over due you have to have ultrasounds and stress tests to ensure the safety of the baby. My ultrasound to make sure everything was OK was actually scheduled the day before I was actually due. Dan really wanted me to avoid it since each ultrasound cost us about 150 dollars. BUT I always rest easier when I see the babies, as I have been spoiled in the past with ultrasounds because of medical conditions. I went in for my ultrasound on March 18 th in the late afternoon right as the office was closing. The ultrasound tech kept saying things like, "where is this fluid?" and "I really need to see this guy move". Rhett was a very passive baby in-uetero (he is making up for it now!) so his non movements did not alarm me. After a good while of pushing hard, Taking measurements, the tech left and returned with the doctor. The Doctor told me I had to go to the hospital right away. I asked if I could go get my hospital bag and she told me no. I guess the jist of the story was that the baby had NO amniotic fluid to measure AND was not moving AT ALL. So on the scale that they use to determine safety of the baby mine was super low.
I panicked. My mind was racing. I was still answering phones for work. I was going to meet my girlfriends in a few short hours for dinner out.I had to call my sister, get Dan...was the baby really in danger?
I got to the hospital where the other Doctor met me and said, "so your the one causing all the problems? We ARE having a baby and depending on how it looks, we may have to do a c-section" I simply told them I was not ready to do this tonight but I would do whatever was best for the baby. They quickly whisked me into a room and started monitoring me.
As things were being monitored Rhett, in fact ,was moving, had a good heart rate, and I was contracting. They asked me if the contractions were doing anything...and of course, they were NOT (they never do until my water breaks).
I also had made it very clear that I did not want to have this baby on Friday as that was Ryland's birthday. I had contemplated already being induced that day...but had chosen against it. You see, Ryland is my middle child and I felt that he needed his own birthDAY and day for him....but Rhett and the doctors had other plans~ and what can you do? So SUPER BIRTHDAY PARTY's at our house in March!!!
I believe the doctor saw my worry about not saying good-bye to the kids and being unprepared for all of this.
SOooo...he sent me home for a few hours where I could collect my thoughts, children, bags and return a few hours later to start the process of bringing Rhett here, as they could NOT let me go with no amniotic fluid...that was still a fact.
I still had NOT done a thing in regards to dilating or the doctor was going to keep me on pit all night and then up it in the morning. The doctor was worried that once I started I would go super fast.

So we quickly returned home to get things in order. We did a quick make-shift birthday party for Ryland and had pizza and opened presents. I finished packing my bag with last minute things, took a shower and shave my legs (the most important things you know!), and also faxed and sent my work orders as well as made a message letting people know we would not be on the phoned Friday (as the owners daughter was getting married the next day so they could not be on the phones either!).

I also got a blessing. I was not scared about what lay ahead--I just felt so unprepared and lost (and worried about the baby). As many of you are well aware...hospitals are NOT the place to get good rest. I did get some sleep however. The pit was not doing much. The only problem we had for a majority of labor was finding Rhett's heart beat. That little stink had a hiding place in me that 4 nurses could never find (until they place and internal monitor in me when they broke my water). So I always had to be on my side in the most uncomfortable of positions for them to keep him monitored...and because of the circumstances he could not go unmonitored. Not to mention the blood pressure cuff and blood draws, and pit bag refills, and the IV in my arm and the fluids being pumped into me. I was a human balloon by morning.
They upped the pit every hour or so and had it pretty high with not much progress...slight, BUT NOT happening. I mentioned that I would progress if my water was broke.

SO at 11:30/12:00pm the doctor came on his lunch break and broke my water--where only a bit came out, but i did have some, (I HATE breaking water, that is one of the most painful experiences especially when you are not dilated) and to place an internal monitor in my uterus and on the baby. Afterwards, I felt violated (for lack of a better word). I began bleeding and the contractions began.
After about an hour the contractions were going pretty good, but I was breathing through them-- and they encouraged me that if I wanted a epidural I probably should get one soon. Although I could have kept on through them I DID NOT want to go through all of labor without an epidural.

So by the time I was prepped and ready the contractions were good enough I could not talk through them. After it was in and working I always swear I would be a poster child for them! As I thought, I went really fast...about 3 hours since my water broke and things started changing.

The epidural was no longer working about an hour in. There was a pain in my bone that was excruciating. I asked the nurse to check me and told her I was experiencing extreme pain every contraction down there and serious pressure. I was at a 6 when she checked and thought about ordering a bolus shot of the epidural...but a few minutes later I was at a 9 and she called the doctor. He was there within 15 minutes and the pain had gone from bad to worse. I could not breathe during contractions and I thought that maybe my pubis synthesis was splitting as it had during Dacie's delivery. I was worried, cold sweat and shaking. The doctor told me to give a quick push, and I was scared!! I did not want to hurt myself like I had with Dacie and not be able to walk.So I gave a half hearted push and out he came...the Doctor said "whoa!" they were not quite ready--and then I understood why I was hurting so bad, poor little Rhett's head was right there trying to get out! I did not split my pubis synthesis and I was so grateful for a quick and healthy delivery!

(the food services sent us up these martinelli's and glasses one afternoon for Dan and I, it was also nice that one of the head food service ladies is my visiting we always got a little extra bacon and other nice things!)
HE WAS HERE!!! He was safe and sound. I had been worried with the no amniotic fluid. HOWEVER there was a true double knot in the chord. In fact, that is such a rarity they came in and took pictures of it for the hospital and doctor. I asked if that could cause a problem with the baby...and the doctor said that it definitely could of, BUT obviously Rhett had worked through it (however I think him being the smallest of my babes may have had something to do with it, as well as his very quiet disposition in-utero)
Rhett had this lip that pouted and said that he was not quite sure what had just taken place!
He was a good baby, he latched right on to me, did not cry at all when they gave him a shot, and slept! (my previous two had issues with that in the hospital)
(this is the face I woke up to every morning..right by my bedside! how lucky am I)
I stayed and extra day in the hospital to get some extra rest and care. Although you do get woken often and people were coming in and out all night. I was on a high and was loving the time I had with just Rhett and I. The whole world had once again stood still and I could smell baby breathe against my cheek.
I had some fun friends come by and help celebrate his arrival. Then some of the kids came to the outside of the hospital in the parking lot, so I could hold Rhett up in my hospital window 4 floors up. The kids were not allowed inside the hospital for H1N1 reasons. I did leave the baby with the nurses and went and visited the kids down in the lobby for a bit!
I was definitely ready to go home when the time arrived and make our family complete and get into our new groove!
(the view from my hospital window)
(we got a good view of Dan's work from our window--the orange roof)
(as well as a good view of our Cottonwood "C")
(the hospital had made a new OB department wing since I had last I took some shots of the great commodities)

(this was Dan's corner as it was his "lovely" sleeping accommodations in the hospital- he spent 2 of the 3 nights with me)
Rhett did in fact have jaundice and we had to monitor it the next weeks or so with a few heel pricks...but he was pretty tolerant of them! AND we never had to do the biliruben lights...thank heavens
Rhett finally took a bottle as my milk never arrives for a few days (including the colostrum)--and is DEFINITELY a pacifier baby...he rarely will go to sleep and stay asleep without one!
(Ready to leave the hospital!)
It seemed to me that spring had sprung while I was in the hospital. Everything had blossomed and it was all welcoming little Rhett home!
It always feels a little solemn leaving the hospital, you are entering the "unknown", it is time to try and re-establish your family, AND newborns are allot of work!
We had a wonderful Sunday afternoon introducing our family to our new addition...and they have welcomed him with loving arms!
(Dan is always super wiped out after having a baby! I get an adrenaline rush and he is plum tuckered out!)
This IS Dacie's baby and she LOVES to be around me and him. She holds pacifiers, wants us to NOT touch the stroller or feed him a bottle (that is where I draw the line) so she CAN do it.

Rhett promptly spit up on Ryland...and Ryland has been a little cautious about touching and holding him, in fact, I do not think he has held him yet! But he loves to ask me if he "can pet him"

I am IN LOVE with our little family and LOVE our new little spirit.
However the day my milk came in postpartum depression hit harder then it ever has.It is a severe case and is very much beyond the blues. I have had to seek help and have been blessed by a wonderful support system. It has been some of my darkest days and I would NEVER wish this on my worst enemy. It has been hard to blog, but I will do it slowly as my mind and body permit. As an article my mom sent to me said, " postpartum depression is a thief that steals motherhood". I KNOW that. I know it is a chemical imbalance that I have no control over.. I have never been good about giving up control. I am learning lots, we are being stretched and I appreciate the patience and outpouring of love we have felt. It is going to be a process and maybe one day I will write a whole book blog about it, but for now I have hope and that is what we are looking forward to!
BUT I DO know I love ALL my children, my husband, my family and good friends- and that love will help us endure it well!